CC is 7 Months Old!

CC is seven months! True to her Aries nature she is a bundle of energy and loves physicality. She is already standing on her own (for about 3 seconds). She is determined to free-stand and just last night she attempted to move on foot to take a step! She is moving fast. I estimate by Christmas she will be walking. She loves to wrestle with her sister and doesn't mind getting knocked around. When she doesn't like something or when SJ is unwilling to share with her she will let out a loud bellow and charge her. It's the funniest thing I've ever seen. She loves water. I guess our summer trip to PR got her acclimated to being in water. She goes gaga over bath time.

She is still a strong nurser and unlike her sister has a strong attachment to me. She has finally allowed D to occupy her while I'm away, but as soon as I'm in her presence she only wants to nurse.

CC and her GMy

Basma 2 + 10 Anniversary Party

Over the Veteran's Day weekend my family got together to celebrate my sister and brother-in-law's second wedding anniversary (+ 10 years together). We made the trip down to Baltimore, the event was in Bethesda, amid tantrums and bathroom breaks. CC got to met her Great Aunt Clara for the first time, so it was well worth the travel drama. I was super excited to finally fit a dress I purchased three years ago from Forever 21. I'm now down to 140 pounds. I gave myself nine months to loose the baby weight and through discipline I did it in six months. Nursing helped tremendously. Because I am nursing and don't want to continue to take a multi-vitamin daily (my life is already chaotic don't need to add a pill in the mix), I eat very wholesome, organic foods. I fall off the wagon one a week and have to have a slice of pizza or some baked ciabatta bread dipped in olive oil.

Always ready to take a pictures, SJ and I took several selfies in the bathroom mirror.

" African Time" or Selective Punctuality?


African time (or Africa time) is the perceived cultural tendency, in most parts of Africa, toward a more relaxed attitude to time . This is sometimes used in a pejorative sense, about tardiness in appointments, meetings and events.[1] This also includes the more leisurely, relaxed, and less rigorously-scheduled lifestyle found in African countries, especially as opposed to the more clock-bound pace of daily life in Western countries.[2] As such it is similar to time orientations in some other non-Western culture regions. {Source: Wikipedia}

 

It is well known (among Nigerians/Africans) that the invitation card of a typical Nigerian event (be it wedding, conference, meeting, fund raising or party) normally starts very late. It is common to witness a Saturday event, scheduled for "9:00 p.m. prompt," starting with the calling of Drs., Sirs, Chiefs, Alhajis, etc., to the "High Table," around 12:30 a.m., the next day, Sunday, especially among Nigerians in Houston. Consequently, a meeting that will take two hours ends up taking half a day or more. We are now familiar with the first opening remarks by the MC/Moderator, which goes like this: "Good evening or Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. We are running a little bit late; please bear with us". {Source here}

 

My sister married into an African family and it was been a bit of a culture shock for her (and the rest of our family for that matter). Primarily the manner in which her African family regard time. During the planning of her party we were vexed with her MIL's insistence of taking care of the catering. We felt it would be disorganized and completely not an effective management of time. Indeed it was. The party began at 7pm. Family members were bringing in food up until 8:45pm, this resulted in the buffet table not being completely set for dinner until 9:00 pm. Being the planner I am I took offensive to the lack of regard to hungry bellies and the non-Africans in attendance (i.e., people not used to waiting three hours to eat dinner). To make a long story show I complained and "offended" people, however soon after my diatribe the food was ready.

Halloween 2013

My next door neighbor, who is six months pregnant, wanted to have a celebration for the kids on Halloween. She decided to asked everyone to bring a pumpkin and we had a BYOP (bring your own pumpkin) party. The kids dressed in their costumes; ate pizza and a selection of dessrts; and painted pumpkins.

 

SJ was being her normal, quiet and reserved self.

 

My little cupcake drank this whole container of green Hawaiian Fruit Punch and went Ape Shit Crazy!!

 

CC is 6 Months Old!

CC is six months old!

 

CC is sitting up unassisted now which is great because she is spending more time on the floor and less time attached to me in the Moby wrap. 

All CC wants wants to do is stand on everyone and everything. She has begun to pull herself up on the edge of the sofa. I'm sure she will be taking steps by Christmas. It seems like she skipped the whole crawling stage, and went immediately to standing. 

CC's favorite position is standing on our laps and bouncing up and down getting her leg muscles strong. I dug out SJ's walker and got it cleaned up in preparation for CC this week.

 

 

 

4th Trimester Bodies Project

Check out the 4th Trimester Bodies Project: 

By showcasing moms, Jackson hopes to shine a light on cultural interpretations of female beauty and change women's expectations for themselves and those around them.

"[T]his project has been something that has felt a necessity in my mind for years now," she told HuffPost by email, adding that the impetus for the series was deeply personal. "After coming out the other side of a very traumatic pregnancy and birth experience myself and struggling with the strangeness of my new body, I felt like it was finally time to make this project a reality."

 


HDC's Itsy Bitsy

Home Decorators Collections is one of the nation's largest direct sellers of home decor. I have ordered countless items from them to decorate our home. I am super excited to learn they have a new Baby and Kids line called Itsy Bitsy. SJ is getting ready for a big girl bed and HDC will be my go to place.

 

Here a few of my favorite pieces:

Carmela Canopy Bed

Custom Channing Upholstered Headboard

Enza Mirrored Door Armoire

SJ in Day Care

SJ will be two and a half in two weeks so we made the decision to place her in "school". After an exhausting day of visiting various centers D finally settled on one he loved. I decided to let him handle the task of selecting the center because he knows the area and demographics of each place. He settled on a center that is affiliated with the Catholic church which was a surprise. The center is small (less than 13 kids) and the children wear uniforms. For the past couple of weeks I have been speaking to SJ about attending "school" and how much fun it will be to play with other children. I'll keep you posted on how everything goes. 

 

Our eight week summer holiday is officially over. Back to work, commuting, and pure exhaustion. As least I will have a gradual, ease in schedule for the first week because I only work two days. But I know the following week will be brutal. CC's on again off again schedule will definitely put me in a bad position. I have a longer compute this year, so hopefully I can take a few cat naps while riding the train. In addition, to all of this I will be conducting my research in hopes of completing my doctorate in December. Talk about multi-tasking and not having enough hours in the day. I am looking at this as a 16 week marathon with 3-4 hour nights of sleep, a toddler and an infant, oh and my third child, D. It will be stressful, but my motto is go hard or go home. 

Our summer in pictures

Part 2: Veiques, Puerto Rico

It took us two tries but we made it to Veiques, an island–municipality of Puerto Rico in the northeastern Caribbean, part of an island grouping sometimes known as the Spanish Virgin Islands.

 

Vieques is definitely a place I would want to stay for a couple of days, to do more exploring and visit the amazing beaches.

We rented a Wrangler for the day, my dream car when I was in high school.

 

 

OMG... We truly had an adventure visiting this Black Sand Beach. First, there were no signs to show exactly where the beach was from the road. We noticed three other Jeeps parked on the side of the road and stopped to inquire. Sure enough the beach was down below, or so we thought. Let me tell you the drama that ensued. We figured it would be a short trail leading to the beach. Chile!! It was a 20 minute walk/HIKE through the wilderness with no directional signs. I made D carry our carryon suitcase because I  didn't want to leave it in the SUV. After about fifteen minutes of walking/hiking we both were frustrated and wondering where the hell was the beach. Low and behold we finally reached the beach and what a magnificent sight it was. We were in stunned awe of the seascape before us. Less than five minutes of us arriving on the beach D was like "Look!" {in a hurried, panicked voice}, he was pointing to the horizon. The sky had turned gray, storm clouds were moving towards us, and the ocean was getting violent. We hauled ass back toward the wilderness for our hike back. The only difference was the sky opened up and it we got a first hand experience of a torrential rain storm. It was horrible! We were slipping, sliding, and cussing. D's flip flop broke and SJ's water shoe fell off without us noticing, so D had to trek back for it. D was carrying SJ and the suitcase. I had CC so I ran the whole way to the Jeep. Once I made it to the road I saw a man coming towards me. I immediately went on alert. Then I noticed his family in the Jeep behind him. He asked me if I needed help and asked where my husband was. I pointed behind me and he was off to assist D. He told me to wait in the car with his family, so I did. Forgot to mention the cute little Jeep we rented had the roof panels off, so the entire interior got wet. :-/

We where the talk of this beach . . . between me being Mommy and SJ with only a PullUp on the Latinas on the beach felt it necessary to let D know they had issues. SMH . . .

 

 

 

 

The Case of Money + the C-Section

I have heard countless women speak about their low-risk pregnancies leading to C-sections. From this I have concluded doctors must be getting some kind of monetary incentive for butchering women without medically sound reasons. In an article written for NPR, Shankar Vedantam, writes abou?t this very idea. His article titled, Money May Be Motivating Doctors To Do More C-Sections, recounts the research of health care economists Erin Johnsonand M. Marit Rehavi.

 "About 1 in 3 babies born today is delivered via C-section, compared to 1 in 5 babies delivered via the surgical procedure in 1996. During the same time period, the annual medical costs of childbirth in the U.S. have grown by $3 billion annually." 

ONE in THREE?! This is scary and has changed the very essence of how humans give birth. It's like how navigation has changed the way humans get around. You almost never hear someone ask for directions, soon its going to be the same with birth. A woman will just schedule her due date and keep it moving. 

"Pregnant doctors are less likely than other women to deliver their babies via C-section, recent research suggests. Economists say that may be because the physician patients feel more empowered to question the obstetrician."

Of course, this is just like executives of Monsanto peddling GMOs and only serving organic foods in their corporate cafeterias or Dr. Oz telling every parent to give their children vaccines when his children are vaccine free. Oh the hypocrisy. 

"They hypothesized that obstetricians would be less likely to be swayed by financial incentives when patients themselves had significant medical expertise and knowledge. By contrast, the researchers figured, such incentives might play a larger role in medical decision-making when patients knew very little."

Indeed knowledge is power.

To read the entire article click here.

Why Aren't You Married?! --- A Man's Perspective

My baby sister and I have this conversation about every other month, the conversation about why the pickings for suitable young, Black men is so slim. I remember her recounting one of her first days of work as an emergency room nurse. She told me there were several young nurses (<30 years old), and the majority of the White nurses were either married or engaged, but the Black nurses were not. In an effort to explain this phenomenon, an article titled 6 Reasons Black People Aren't Getting Married was written by Walter Ward III. 

Here are Walter's Six Reasons:

  1. Finances
  2. Too Many Choices
  3. Lack of Maturity
  4. Too Much Baggage
  5. Fear
  6. Dating Poorly

 "The lack of a healthy marriage in the home doesn’t just affect young men.  In fact, it may be difficult for women to identify the traits of a good future father and husband as a result.  This means that many women make poor choices in who they date and are hurt because of the experience."

Let me speak on this . . . D and I have had many rough patches in our relationship because of the simple fact that along with being his women I had to also be his teacher. His teacher in the way a healthy, vivable relationship should be. Yes, he has definitely been the catalyst for some disfunction in our relationship due to his upbringing. Our saving grace has been the fact that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, at 20 years old, he wanted to marry me. No immaturity was involved, just Hood Ass Tendancies (HAT). I could have easily fallen into the category of woman trying to change an unfit man. I often think back to the first five years of our relationship and wonder what the hell was I thinking. In the end I knew he was worth the lessons and willing to change and learn new ways of doing things. I was unwilling to let the HAT color our relationship, I staged a war and in the end I won, but chile' the battle was long and hard. Knowing D was super ambitious, loyal, and in absolute love with me help tremendously. 

 

Bilinigual Babies

SJ has definitely come to comprehend both English and Spanish. As we desperately search for a day care center for her September admittance we discussed a center in which Spanish was spoken or taught. On my Facebook feed today I read a NY Times article that highlighted questions I've had about teaching our girls to be bilingual from birth. Check out the highlights. The originial article is here.

Over the past decade, Ellen Bialystok, a distinguished research professor of psychology at York University in Toronto, has shown that bilingual children develop crucial skills in addition to their double vocabularies, learning different ways to solve logic problems or to handle multitasking, skills that are often considered part of the brain’s so-called executive function.

These higher-level cognitive abilities are localized to the frontal and prefrontal cortex in the brain. “Overwhelmingly, children who are bilingual from early on have precocious development of executive function,” Dr. Bialystok said.

Dr. Kuhl calls bilingual babies “more cognitively flexible” than monolingual infants.

SJ has chosen to speak primarly in English, considering she has been exposed to both English and Spanish equally, I often wonder if its because I speak English.

 

Check out this TED video presented by Patricia Kuhl titled, The linguistic genius of babies. 

 

Diaper Blues

"Thirty percent of the women interviewed for a new study published Monday in the journal Pediatrics said they'd experienced a time when they could not afford to buy the diapers their kids needed. And a full 8 percent reported that they would “stretch” the diapers they had when their supply was running short by leaving a wet diaper on their child or partially cleaning the diaper and reusing it." SOURCE

 

Before SJ was potty trained I spent about $150 a month for wipes and diapers. I remember CC's first month we went through three boxes of diapers (being breastfeed and all)! I was sick to death with friggin' Pampers, so here is what I did. First I begged D to speed up his efforts to potty train SJ, then I began to purchase the LUV brand diapers, and to take it even further I began to purchase whatever size diapers where on clearance (didn't matter that CC is a size 2 diaper, if size 5 were on clearance that is what she would be wearing). As I type this CC has on a size 5 diaper and SJ is freeballing it. You got to do what you got to do. 

 

"A 2010 study commissioned by diaper-maker Huggies found that one in three of the 1,513 U.S. mothers surveyed had cut back on essentials such as food, child care or utilities to afford diapers for their children. Of those surveyed, 26 percent were living below the poverty line, 32 percent were above poverty but living in financial hardship and 42 percent were not experiencing financial hardship." SOURCE

While on vacay we went out to eat and forgot to bring diapers, so CC had to wear D's tank top on her bum.



Puerto Rico 2013

We are back from our annual trip to Puerto Rico.

 

I packed enough for a trip around the world and back, add on all the young children equipment (i.e., stroller base, two car seats w/ base, potty, organic whole milk, breast pump, diapers and pull ups) and you got a stressful situation.

 

We took an early morning flight to P.R. which was ideal for the girls' schedule. Everyone slept the majority of the three and a half hour flight (I'll share all the items I packed in my carry-on for toddler entertainment in a subsequent post). I kept CC in my Moby Wrap from the time we arrived to the airport to we reached the condo. Going through security was one-two-three because of the wrap. I just wish we could travel with less stuff. I love how TSA, other travelers, and airline personnel give you special treatment when flying with small kids.  Since having children, D and I either fly first class or the very last row of seats on the plane. SJ (Lil D) had her own seat this time so we had quite a bit of space to move around.

We always stay at the Racquet Club in Isla Verde. Its central to all highways, super markets, restaurants, and beaches. 

 Once we touched down in P.R. CC became a totally different baby. No more crying fits and only wanting Mommy. She allowed everyone to hold her and didn't cry much at all. The Puerto Rican sun agreed with her. It was kind of freaky how mellow she was while we were away.

 

This trip made me appreciate all the times I've gone to the beach prior to having children. Babies+ Beach+Sand = Disaster waiting to happen. Between lathering SJ and CC up in coconut oil (worked well) and telling SJ to not throw sand in CC's face it was a nerve racking experience. 

 As you can see above this fool brought his pitbulls to the beach and guess what one (the one to the left) got loose!! Chile' I picked up my babies so fast and hightailed it to the water in like 3 seconds flat. The picture of SJ, on the lower right was taken right before the beast got loose. 

Enjoying a pina colada daily was on the menu.

Half way through our stay we decided we wanted to visit Vieques, one of the island off the main Puerto Rico island, for the day. Well we woke up at 4:00 in the morning and drove an hour to Fajardo to purchase tickets for the ferry. We didn't make it, the port was soooo crowded with people traveling to Culebra, another island, that we just said F it and decided to return a different day. Because we were on that side of the island we decided to brave the environment and visit the rainforest, El Yunque. We hiked the half a mile trail to the Cascada La Mina. The other parts of the forest we looked at via a car ride, because the trail took everything out of us.

You see my homemade wrap. It was just 5 yards of a breathable, stretchy material from Walmart. Cost $7.

Beach hopping was a daily adventure

The kids got the sniffles towards the end of the vacay, a trip to the 24 hour Walgreens for Vicks and nasal saline was in order.

  We visited Viejo San Juan for more exercise, lots of hills, and to visit El Morro. We also got tasty coconut treats.

 

 

In the extreme heat he visited the fortress, El Morro.

It was so hot we had to take a quick stop to the plaza to get wet

 

Condado Beach

Homeopathic Immunizations

To vax or not to vax . . .  This is the question I've been researching for the last year. I recently, last night, found a new element to this whole vaccination topic: Homeopathic Immunizations or Homeoprophylaxis (HP). Its been around for over 200 years and has been proven to be a safer alternative to traditional vaccination methods. So what exactly is it you ask? Well let me explain. All information below is from the wonderful resource Organic Life Love's site here.

 

Homeoprophylaxis is a highly dilute preparation from a disease product i.e. from the sputum of an individual with the disease, or in the case of influenzium (homeopathic version of the flu shot), the four viruses selected by the WHO for the annual flu vaccine. 

It works by naturally strengthening the resistance of the individual instead of targeting the pathogen, bacteria, or virus that causes the epidemic disease.  For this reason pathogens can never develop a resistance to the prophylactics.

Homeopathic immunization protects those that traditional vaccines are unsuitable (such as those who have had adverse reactions to other vaccines, the malnourished, the sick and deblitated, the immune-compromised, the pregnant, those allergic to vaccine materials, and those on steroids.)

It is also highly effective for travelers that need specific disease prevention going into a particular area.

Comparing the differences between vaccines and homeopathic immunization

Vaccination

  • Material dose; live, attenuated or killed virus, bacteria, toxin, in crude dose
  • Adjuvants to stimulate allergic repsonse and other additives with the possibility of other viruses, human fetus tissue, and DNA, animal byproducts etc.
  • Preservatives such as thiomersal, formaldehyde etc.
  • Germ/adjuvants injected directly into the blood stream bypassing peripheral immune system
  • Multiple diseases given at once
  • Specific antibody production expected in immune systems that are too immature to produce antibodies (infants til 1-2 years of age)

Homeoprophylaxis

  • Energetic dose; substances are potentized/diluted to reduce material dose but retain memory of disease/pathogen
  • Nosodes are sourced from pure germ/viral culture or human discharge response to the  germ
  • No adjuvants, preservatives or contaminants
  • Administered orally with sugar pellets
  • Single disease at a time
  • From birth on general immune system functions are fully active and therefore responsive to general stimulation

 

NEW JERSEY
1)  Many people recommend strongly:  Dr. Howard Schlachter  228 Roseland Ave  Essex Fells, NJ 07021  973-226-8393 
2)  Auletta Maria MD 23 South Main Street  # 25  Manville, NJ 08835-1801 (908) 243-0088   I live in cetnral NJ and this is my family doctor-almost 90% of her patients are family with vaccine free children.
3) Pediatric Associates in Neptune NJ. 
4) Dr. Fisch in Oradell NJ

5) South NJ area: Haddon Pediatric Group (Dr. Schlitt- not sure which one, there are three).  Accept Non vaccinated babies and children without problem.   They have offices in Mullica Hill and Haddon Heights. http://www.advocaredoctors.com

6) There is a really good doctor in Hillsborough NJ that accepts unvaccinated kids and respects being vaccine free her name is Dr Li Jiang and the clinic is Hills Pediatrics 908 725 0875

7) Oradell -Dr Rosen of the Whope Child Center

8) Hackettstown, Warren County.  Dr. Chi. 

 Source

 

More resources below

An Informed Decision

Vax Philosophical Exemptions: A Moral and Ethical Imperative

HP STATUS SHEET

NJ Coalition for Vaccination Choice

Top 10 Reasons NJ Needs the Conscientious Exemption to Mandatory Vaccinations Bill A1368